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Our dream five-a-side team made up of men's hairstyles

06 February 2020
2-minute read

GK - Short back and sides 

Think: Manuel Neuer 

You need your goalie to be solid and dependable - the less risky they are, the better. The classic short back and sides hairstyle is the undeniable choice here. No one is a better example of a dependable keeper with a dependable haircut than Manuel Neuer - the four-time winner of the UEFA Goalkeeper of the Year award. You can get a short back and sides from any barber’s seat in the world and know you’ll walk out with a respectable trim - safety first.

DEF - Buzzcut

Think: Willy Boly

Like your keeper, your defender’s main asset is their reliability. However, they should also add a touch of intimidation too. We’re not suggesting they should practice violence, but it can’t hurt if that idea crosses the opposition’s striker. We’re sure that Willy Boly (the 6ft 3in centre-back for Wolves) has made more than one striker think twice about it. The buzzcut is perfect for this position: a strong look with just a pinch of scary for good measure. 

MID -  Messy crop 

Think: Lucas Torreira

The holding midfielder is the thinking man’s position - the player that truly reads and dictates the game. To play the ‘four’, you’re going to need someone with a little bit of creativity and vision, like Lucas Torreira - the Uruguayan has been a revelation for Arsenal’s midfield. The messy crop is the go-to holding midfielder hairstyle in our books - they’ve put a little bit of thought into maintaining a trendy look without sacrificing on practicality. Ideal.

MID -  Man Bun

Think: Gareth Bale

Usually, the player that everyone loves to hate. An attacking five-a-side midfielder (should) have the skill to run rings around you for fun. Whilst they are annoying to play against, you can’t help but secretly admire their style of play. The man bun is the perfect choice for this position - quite annoying in principle but also sleek and stylish. No footballer has ever owned this look more than the Welsh Wizard - Gareth Bale.

ST - Pompadour

Think: Olivier Giroud

When it comes to your five-a-side striker, you’re looking for two things - confidence and finesse. You want your goalscorer to be the most arrogant and skilful player on the pitch because it will help them to put more chances away. The pompadour is the perfect match - it’s a bold choice that requires a lot of finesse (and belief) to get it looking prim and proper. If there’s one player that rocks a prim and proper pompadour, it’s Olivier Giroud 

Five-a-side teams can encompass a variety of styles, positions and abilities - that’s part of the fun. However, at the heart of every great five-a-side team, there’s a plan. Sons haircare products are backed by science and tailored into treatment plans to keep your hair in game-winning condition.